1 00:00:01,596 --> 00:00:04,590 _ 2 00:00:08,786 --> 00:00:11,058 Delilah's not living in Ithaca, okay? 3 00:00:11,059 --> 00:00:12,898 Nobody moves to Ithaca on purpose. 4 00:00:12,899 --> 00:00:15,102 - Why not? - 'Cause it sucks, okay? 5 00:00:16,299 --> 00:00:17,818 She's not here. I'm not buying it. 6 00:00:17,933 --> 00:00:19,162 - Oh, you're not buying it. - No. 7 00:00:19,213 --> 00:00:20,468 - But you bought Tibet. - I didn't. 8 00:00:20,561 --> 00:00:22,531 - You bought Japan. - I don't even know what that word is. 9 00:00:22,532 --> 00:00:24,845 I don't know, these guys I talked to seemed pretty certain it was her. 10 00:00:27,168 --> 00:00:28,791 Who, these guys here? Bo and Luke Duke? 11 00:00:28,859 --> 00:00:30,965 - Oh, yeah... - All right, follow me. 12 00:00:32,843 --> 00:00:33,843 Hi. Hey. 13 00:00:33,844 --> 00:00:35,937 - Uh, you're... Are you Donny? - Yeah, yeah. 14 00:00:35,938 --> 00:00:37,951 Uh, So you guys have seen our daughter, Delilah? 15 00:00:38,279 --> 00:00:39,960 Mm-hmm. Lookin' younger than the poster, 16 00:00:39,961 --> 00:00:41,485 but it's definitely her, all right. 17 00:00:41,485 --> 00:00:43,485 Yeah, she walks around here like she's better than all of us. 18 00:00:43,486 --> 00:00:44,719 Well, she is better than all of yous. 19 00:00:44,720 --> 00:00:45,962 Okay. Hold on. 20 00:00:45,963 --> 00:00:47,344 - Do you know her? - Nope. 21 00:00:47,511 --> 00:00:49,686 She keeps to herself mostly. Lives with that rock star. 22 00:00:49,720 --> 00:00:51,174 - He's disabled. - Yes... Yes, he is. 23 00:00:51,757 --> 00:00:53,698 Okay, well, which one of these shit boxes is she living in? 24 00:00:54,035 --> 00:00:55,485 We would love to help you guys out 25 00:00:55,519 --> 00:00:56,866 out of the goodness of our hearts, 26 00:00:56,900 --> 00:00:58,281 but we got bills to pay. 27 00:00:58,314 --> 00:01:00,454 Ah, right, of course you do. The $500 reward. 28 00:01:00,490 --> 00:01:01,521 - Yeah. - Right. Yeah 29 00:01:02,733 --> 00:01:03,734 Okay. 30 00:01:03,769 --> 00:01:05,150 All right. Here you go. 31 00:01:05,184 --> 00:01:06,876 Hey, hold up. How'd you get that? 32 00:01:06,910 --> 00:01:08,291 Those were only up in Syracuse. 33 00:01:08,325 --> 00:01:09,844 We're amateur detectives. 34 00:01:09,879 --> 00:01:11,513 - It's kind of our thing. - Yeah, I almost forgot. 35 00:01:11,514 --> 00:01:13,020 I found this phone bill in her garbage. 36 00:01:13,054 --> 00:01:15,539 A lot of calls or what you might call "collusion" 37 00:01:15,574 --> 00:01:17,248 to some weird number in Russia. 38 00:01:17,667 --> 00:01:20,118 Yeah. Yeah, that's my dad's number. 39 00:01:20,234 --> 00:01:21,494 Do you need more proof? 40 00:01:24,514 --> 00:01:26,171 - Okay. All right. Here you go. - Yeah. 41 00:01:26,205 --> 00:01:27,862 Now, where is she? 42 00:01:27,897 --> 00:01:29,775 Oh, shit, there she goes. 43 00:01:45,224 --> 00:01:46,421 Get some! 44 00:01:47,710 --> 00:01:49,021 Oh, shit. 45 00:01:52,576 --> 00:01:54,855 Whoa. 46 00:01:55,562 --> 00:01:56,669 Oh. Oh. 47 00:01:57,720 --> 00:01:59,722 Oh, shit. 48 00:01:59,756 --> 00:02:01,827 Delilah! Delilah! 49 00:02:13,908 --> 00:02:15,876 Are you okay? 50 00:02:15,910 --> 00:02:17,004 Babe? 51 00:02:17,097 --> 00:02:18,246 Babe, are you okay? 52 00:02:20,777 --> 00:02:22,227 - Babe? - Yeah. 53 00:02:32,271 --> 00:02:33,859 Blue Jay. 54 00:02:33,894 --> 00:02:35,171 Robin. 55 00:02:35,608 --> 00:02:36,620 What? 56 00:02:36,655 --> 00:02:38,749 Um... My twin sister. 57 00:02:39,856 --> 00:02:40,856 Yeah. 58 00:02:43,213 --> 00:02:44,905 - What? - Yeah. 59 00:02:47,597 --> 00:02:49,019 Twin sister. 60 00:02:49,806 --> 00:02:51,256 I jumped a shark. 61 00:02:51,290 --> 00:02:52,913 Oh. 62 00:02:52,947 --> 00:02:54,431 Aah! 63 00:03:06,354 --> 00:03:08,634 So what brings you by after all these years? 64 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:10,585 Oh, we were led to believe by a couple of morons 65 00:03:10,620 --> 00:03:11,980 that our daughter was staying here. 66 00:03:11,982 --> 00:03:13,325 You have a little girl? 67 00:03:13,418 --> 00:03:14,937 That's so incredible. 68 00:03:14,966 --> 00:03:16,553 Yeah, two kids, actually. Twins. 69 00:03:16,588 --> 00:03:18,107 Wow, just like us. 70 00:03:18,141 --> 00:03:19,625 Well, I would love to meet them. 71 00:03:19,660 --> 00:03:20,861 Are they here? Where are they? 72 00:03:20,862 --> 00:03:25,804 Well, uh, one of them ran away, and the other one is... 73 00:03:25,838 --> 00:03:27,668 - Oh, my God, where is he? - He's at my mom's. 74 00:03:27,702 --> 00:03:29,221 Can we just back it up for a second? 75 00:03:29,256 --> 00:03:30,498 Maybe it's the concussion talking, 76 00:03:30,533 --> 00:03:32,293 but remember the other day when I said, 77 00:03:32,328 --> 00:03:33,950 "Is there anything I don't know about you?" 78 00:03:33,985 --> 00:03:36,228 And you said, "Well, I don't like squash." 79 00:03:36,263 --> 00:03:37,989 And I said, "The vegetable or the game?" 80 00:03:38,023 --> 00:03:40,336 - And you said, "Both." - Both. 81 00:03:40,370 --> 00:03:41,993 Well, maybe you could have [bleep] told me 82 00:03:42,027 --> 00:03:43,685 you had a twin sister. 83 00:03:44,892 --> 00:03:46,480 Well, if it makes you feel any better, 84 00:03:46,514 --> 00:03:47,930 she's never mentioned you, either. 85 00:03:47,964 --> 00:03:49,103 No, I did. Ah.. 86 00:03:49,118 --> 00:03:50,351 It was the last time I talked to you, 87 00:03:50,352 --> 00:03:53,541 as a matter of fact, at the funeral of, um, uh, Beth... 88 00:03:54,005 --> 00:03:55,696 uh, Becky? 89 00:03:55,730 --> 00:03:57,399 It's Beckany. I never forget a name. 90 00:03:58,009 --> 00:03:59,527 And all you said was, "Oh, hey, B.J." 91 00:03:59,562 --> 00:04:01,150 I met this boring meathead hockey player, 92 00:04:01,184 --> 00:04:02,979 and I'm gonna use him to clean up my selfish 93 00:04:03,014 --> 00:04:04,843 destructive lifestyle," or something like that. 94 00:04:04,877 --> 00:04:06,189 I don't really... I'm paraphrasing. 95 00:04:06,224 --> 00:04:08,536 - That's... - A spot-on impression. 96 00:04:08,571 --> 00:04:10,021 Well, now that I've met you, 97 00:04:10,055 --> 00:04:12,540 I can see why she's been hiding you. 98 00:04:12,575 --> 00:04:14,680 Nate the Great, look at you. 99 00:04:14,715 --> 00:04:16,993 You are such a peach. 100 00:04:17,028 --> 00:04:19,202 And you got such strong bones. 101 00:04:19,237 --> 00:04:21,342 Makes me feel awful I almost broke 'em all. 102 00:04:21,377 --> 00:04:22,649 - Feel that one. - Ooh. 103 00:04:22,651 --> 00:04:23,655 - Huh. - Mm. 104 00:04:23,689 --> 00:04:26,024 Stop it. 105 00:04:26,382 --> 00:04:27,866 By the way, I don't tell you about my past 106 00:04:27,900 --> 00:04:29,454 because my past sucks. 107 00:04:29,488 --> 00:04:31,456 She doesn't suck. She's awesome. 108 00:04:31,496 --> 00:04:33,360 She doesn't seem to have any of the shit-show genes 109 00:04:33,389 --> 00:04:34,494 your sisters have. 110 00:04:34,495 --> 00:04:36,557 Trust me, she is the shit-showiest of them all. 111 00:04:37,013 --> 00:04:38,877 For instance, we were both born in New York, 112 00:04:38,911 --> 00:04:42,284 but she was "raised" in Alabama, so somehow she has an accent. 113 00:04:42,743 --> 00:04:43,882 That's not how accents work. 114 00:04:43,916 --> 00:04:45,194 That's exactly how accents work. 115 00:04:45,228 --> 00:04:46,711 No. 116 00:04:47,626 --> 00:04:48,821 Mm. 117 00:04:49,439 --> 00:04:51,126 Mmm, that's good. 118 00:04:51,545 --> 00:04:52,891 It's a frozen dinner, Nate. 119 00:04:52,925 --> 00:04:55,171 Well, she heated it up perfectly. 120 00:04:55,790 --> 00:04:57,033 Blue Jay, these are amazing. 121 00:04:57,068 --> 00:04:59,518 Oh, please, call me B.J. I prefer it. 122 00:04:59,553 --> 00:05:01,244 And I'm sure you do, too. 123 00:05:01,279 --> 00:05:03,310 I do. 124 00:05:04,075 --> 00:05:05,731 She can pull off an innuendo. 125 00:05:05,766 --> 00:05:08,009 None of that "spit on it and stick it in" shit. 126 00:05:08,458 --> 00:05:11,151 Can you believe how two identical-looking people 127 00:05:11,185 --> 00:05:12,221 could be so different? 128 00:05:12,255 --> 00:05:13,968 Oh, no, we're very much alike. 129 00:05:14,223 --> 00:05:15,776 In fact, when we were kids, 130 00:05:15,810 --> 00:05:18,436 we used to dress the same and fool our parents. 131 00:05:18,606 --> 00:05:21,609 Too bad they were too busy being criminals to notice. 132 00:05:21,644 --> 00:05:23,059 Oh, what do you say, Robin? 133 00:05:23,094 --> 00:05:25,613 Let's pull a "Parent Trap" for old time's sake, huh? 134 00:05:25,648 --> 00:05:26,925 - Huh. - No. 135 00:05:26,959 --> 00:05:28,168 - Come on, please. - Yes. 136 00:05:28,202 --> 00:05:29,341 - Yes. - No. 137 00:05:29,376 --> 00:05:31,289 Just do it. What's the worst that's gonna happen? 138 00:05:35,352 --> 00:05:36,590 This is not the same dress. 139 00:05:36,624 --> 00:05:38,385 Oh, yes, it is. I make them myself. 140 00:05:38,419 --> 00:05:40,456 Okay, Nate, which one's which? 141 00:05:40,490 --> 00:05:41,689 It's so hard to tell. I mean, 142 00:05:41,691 --> 00:05:43,529 one is a beautiful oil painting, 143 00:05:43,562 --> 00:05:46,945 and the other one is, uh... my wife. 144 00:05:46,979 --> 00:05:49,465 Listen, I would fill this out, too, if I hadn't had kids, so... 145 00:05:49,499 --> 00:05:51,570 Oh, I've missed you so much, 146 00:05:51,605 --> 00:05:53,572 but I don't blame you for shutting out your past. 147 00:05:53,607 --> 00:05:55,643 - It sucked. - Yeah, see? 148 00:05:55,678 --> 00:05:57,542 Do you ever wish when our mother left J.R., 149 00:05:57,576 --> 00:05:58,688 she took both of us with her? 150 00:05:58,689 --> 00:06:01,072 Yeah. Yeah, but there was only one seat on the plane. 151 00:06:01,442 --> 00:06:03,617 Is that what she told you? Hm. 152 00:06:03,651 --> 00:06:05,378 She told me it was 'cause you were fussy. 153 00:06:06,689 --> 00:06:07,897 I was a child. 154 00:06:07,931 --> 00:06:09,537 Well, you two never really clicked. 155 00:06:09,538 --> 00:06:10,727 Oh, what a bitch. 156 00:06:10,762 --> 00:06:11,832 Stop it. 157 00:06:11,866 --> 00:06:14,800 You hush, Robin. She did the best she could. 158 00:06:14,835 --> 00:06:17,389 Hey, did you know she was living in Italy of all places now? 159 00:06:17,424 --> 00:06:18,865 - Okay. - What? 160 00:06:19,184 --> 00:06:20,634 You told me she was dead. 161 00:06:20,668 --> 00:06:22,808 She is. She's dead to me. 162 00:06:22,843 --> 00:06:24,367 That's not the same thing. 163 00:06:25,156 --> 00:06:27,846 She lives in Italy, the one place I've always wanted to go. 164 00:06:28,715 --> 00:06:29,819 Time to make amends. 165 00:06:29,861 --> 00:06:30,966 Ain't that right, Nate. 166 00:06:30,968 --> 00:06:32,970 I used to blame J.R. for splitting up our family. 167 00:06:33,164 --> 00:06:34,648 I was only allowed to see my sister 168 00:06:34,682 --> 00:06:36,305 during nondenominational holidays 169 00:06:36,339 --> 00:06:38,030 and the occasional diamond smuggle, 170 00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:40,740 but I said, "No, that is no way to live!" 171 00:06:40,999 --> 00:06:43,590 So now I talk to J.R. like almost every other day. 172 00:06:44,209 --> 00:06:45,797 He calls me his gummy bear. 173 00:06:45,831 --> 00:06:48,006 Now I get the nickname. I mean, it suits you. 174 00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:49,145 So sweet, you know. 175 00:06:49,180 --> 00:06:51,395 You'd be like a Sour Patch. 176 00:06:51,665 --> 00:06:54,530 B.J., who's talking? 177 00:06:54,564 --> 00:06:56,877 Nate, Robin, meet my boyfriend. 178 00:06:58,913 --> 00:07:00,751 Shut up. 179 00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:02,986 - That's not your boyfriend. - It's Claude. 180 00:07:03,021 --> 00:07:06,197 It's like Claude Gable. 181 00:07:06,231 --> 00:07:07,296 You know what they say. 182 00:07:07,297 --> 00:07:10,128 Two identical sisters end up with two identical men. 183 00:07:10,162 --> 00:07:12,509 Oh, shit. Jesus. 184 00:07:12,544 --> 00:07:14,787 You're both so clumsy and accident prone. 185 00:07:14,822 --> 00:07:16,237 You hit me with a car. 186 00:07:16,272 --> 00:07:18,791 Oh! Oh, shit! 187 00:07:18,826 --> 00:07:21,779 Oh, God, I got glass in my shins. 188 00:07:21,780 --> 00:07:24,346 Oh, I got glass in my penis. 189 00:07:24,347 --> 00:07:26,660 See? Two peas in a pod. 190 00:07:28,974 --> 00:07:32,322 Oh, man. 191 00:07:35,544 --> 00:07:38,811 Here comes the sghetti train. 192 00:07:38,846 --> 00:07:41,538 Chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga. 193 00:07:41,573 --> 00:07:43,092 - Eat some good sghetti. - What is happening? 194 00:07:43,126 --> 00:07:44,541 It's your favorite kind of sghetti, 195 00:07:44,576 --> 00:07:47,199 the sghetti with the meatballs. 196 00:07:47,234 --> 00:07:49,339 Here comes the airplane. 197 00:07:50,568 --> 00:07:52,079 Wasn't she just a train? 198 00:07:52,653 --> 00:07:54,310 That's your takeaway from all this? 199 00:07:54,344 --> 00:07:56,036 - Ow, sghetti's hot. - I'm sorry. 200 00:07:58,521 --> 00:08:00,281 Okay, how about now? Just right? 201 00:08:00,528 --> 00:08:01,874 No, it's too cold. 202 00:08:01,946 --> 00:08:03,491 Oh, hush now. You just eat it. 203 00:08:08,013 --> 00:08:10,015 Did he just fall asleep with his eyes open? 204 00:08:10,050 --> 00:08:12,397 - No, he's awake. - He's snoring. 205 00:08:12,431 --> 00:08:14,054 He's got wake-apnea. 206 00:08:14,088 --> 00:08:15,503 You know what? I think B.J. and I 207 00:08:15,538 --> 00:08:17,540 are gonna go for a little walk, catch up, yeah? 208 00:08:17,574 --> 00:08:18,851 Oh, that sounds great. 209 00:08:18,886 --> 00:08:20,992 Honey, do you mind if I go on a walk with Robin? 210 00:08:22,441 --> 00:08:24,064 Okay, good. I'm just gonna go tinkle real quick. 211 00:08:24,098 --> 00:08:25,165 I'll be right back. 212 00:08:25,210 --> 00:08:26,652 - You're fine, right? - What? No. 213 00:08:26,687 --> 00:08:28,033 No, don't leave me here with him. 214 00:08:28,068 --> 00:08:29,517 - She needs help. - What do you care? 215 00:08:29,552 --> 00:08:30,898 You haven't seen her in 16 years. 216 00:08:30,932 --> 00:08:31,933 She's family. 217 00:08:31,968 --> 00:08:33,349 We don't give up on family we like. 218 00:08:33,383 --> 00:08:35,558 - You said that. - Yeah, about our daughter. 219 00:08:35,592 --> 00:08:38,181 And we need to get back to Syracuse and not give up on her. 220 00:08:38,216 --> 00:08:40,942 I can't let her stay in this relationship. 221 00:08:40,977 --> 00:08:42,323 It's none of your business. 222 00:08:42,358 --> 00:08:44,084 What if someone had told you to give up on me? 223 00:08:44,118 --> 00:08:45,350 They did. 224 00:08:46,293 --> 00:08:47,359 Who? 225 00:08:47,519 --> 00:08:48,765 Everybody. 226 00:08:49,227 --> 00:08:50,607 - You ready to go? - Yeah. 227 00:08:50,642 --> 00:08:52,076 - You'll be fine, right? - No, I'm not fine. 228 00:08:52,092 --> 00:08:53,265 Just do it. 229 00:08:59,306 --> 00:09:01,377 So can you hear me? 230 00:09:03,620 --> 00:09:04,915 Oh. 231 00:09:06,761 --> 00:09:10,179 Oh, you weren't snoring. You were choking on a meatball. 232 00:09:10,213 --> 00:09:11,594 Can you put that back in? 233 00:09:11,628 --> 00:09:12,629 No. 234 00:09:12,664 --> 00:09:14,374 I'm hungry. 235 00:09:15,425 --> 00:09:17,703 Pick up a fork like a big boy. 236 00:09:17,738 --> 00:09:18,980 Oh. 237 00:09:19,015 --> 00:09:20,549 What the hell are you doing with Claude? 238 00:09:20,550 --> 00:09:21,914 We've been through so much together. 239 00:09:21,949 --> 00:09:23,433 What would he do without me? 240 00:09:23,468 --> 00:09:24,952 I'm still nursing him back to health. 241 00:09:24,986 --> 00:09:27,127 I know, but you... you can't just live for him. 242 00:09:27,161 --> 00:09:28,645 You have to have a life of your own. 243 00:09:28,680 --> 00:09:29,957 Take Nate for instance. 244 00:09:29,991 --> 00:09:32,615 He's gone above and beyond for his family. 245 00:09:32,649 --> 00:09:34,548 He's traveled the world to find our daughter, 246 00:09:34,582 --> 00:09:35,756 and what's he done for himself? 247 00:09:35,790 --> 00:09:36,791 He's done nothing. 248 00:09:36,826 --> 00:09:38,552 - That's incredible. - No, it's stupid. 249 00:09:38,586 --> 00:09:41,141 The guy is so selfless, it's eating him up inside. 250 00:09:41,175 --> 00:09:43,522 He really needs to blow off steam big-time. 251 00:09:47,112 --> 00:09:49,218 - Yeah. - Ooh. 252 00:09:49,252 --> 00:09:50,667 Like that. Yes. 253 00:09:50,702 --> 00:09:52,036 Nate used to drink like that. 254 00:09:52,037 --> 00:09:53,498 He did. It made him feel great. 255 00:09:53,532 --> 00:09:55,396 He used to call it his "wha'sup, wha'sup juice." 256 00:09:56,541 --> 00:09:58,848 Yeah, he'd get all liquored up, and we would have the best sex, 257 00:09:58,882 --> 00:10:01,471 and now he doesn't touch it. 258 00:10:01,506 --> 00:10:02,507 The booze or you? 259 00:10:02,736 --> 00:10:04,267 Ha ha! Both. 260 00:10:04,302 --> 00:10:05,406 I love Nate. 261 00:10:05,441 --> 00:10:07,408 I know. I'm pretty lucky to have him. 262 00:10:07,443 --> 00:10:09,134 I wouldn't tell him that to his face 263 00:10:09,169 --> 00:10:10,860 'cause he'd get a big head, but yeah. 264 00:10:10,894 --> 00:10:14,139 I hate Claude, like, so much. 265 00:10:14,174 --> 00:10:16,215 Like a burning, seething hatred. 266 00:10:21,215 --> 00:10:22,665 It's gonna be a hell of a ride, huh? 267 00:10:22,699 --> 00:10:25,357 Yeah, safety first, man. 268 00:10:25,392 --> 00:10:26,809 Hang on. 269 00:10:30,086 --> 00:10:32,019 You need to put a helmet on? 270 00:10:32,053 --> 00:10:33,613 Just psych a brother up. 271 00:10:34,711 --> 00:10:36,403 Thanks, man. 272 00:10:38,577 --> 00:10:40,372 Probably faster if I just carried you down. 273 00:10:40,407 --> 00:10:41,891 Yeah. 274 00:10:45,239 --> 00:10:47,345 Dude, you really can't walk down three stairs. 275 00:10:47,379 --> 00:10:48,656 Soft bones. 276 00:10:48,691 --> 00:10:50,071 What's that mean? Like rickets? 277 00:10:50,106 --> 00:10:51,176 Soft bones. 278 00:10:51,211 --> 00:10:54,006 Doc says I'm like a bag of wet sticks. 279 00:10:55,215 --> 00:10:57,562 That means it's safe to unbuckle my seat belt. 280 00:10:57,788 --> 00:11:01,186 Oh, man, I forgot my cheese. 281 00:11:17,961 --> 00:11:20,544 You're not gonna believe this. 282 00:11:21,620 --> 00:11:23,484 It's down there. 283 00:11:23,519 --> 00:11:25,055 I can smell it. 284 00:11:26,211 --> 00:11:28,075 We just got to find it. 285 00:11:38,913 --> 00:11:40,191 Means it's done. 286 00:11:40,225 --> 00:11:41,261 You said that. 287 00:11:41,295 --> 00:11:44,160 You can't say important things too much. 288 00:11:46,266 --> 00:11:48,233 Gonna put it back. 289 00:11:48,268 --> 00:11:50,443 Oh, my God. Jesus Christ. 290 00:11:50,542 --> 00:11:53,027 Ooh. My goodness. 291 00:11:53,169 --> 00:11:54,550 - Yes. - You're right. 292 00:11:54,584 --> 00:11:56,539 I need to start doing some stuff for myself. 293 00:11:56,615 --> 00:11:58,036 That was a quick turnaround, but great. 294 00:11:58,070 --> 00:11:59,762 Yes. Then leave him. 295 00:12:01,177 --> 00:12:03,144 Hey, boys, wha'sup, wha'sup? 296 00:12:03,179 --> 00:12:04,422 Oh, no, no, no. 297 00:12:04,456 --> 00:12:05,940 Looks like someone founds her daughter. 298 00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:08,702 - Uh, no, my daughter's 16. - Well, no refunds. 299 00:12:08,736 --> 00:12:11,222 Yeah, but we'd like to buy you fine ladies 300 00:12:11,256 --> 00:12:12,430 a well drink of your choice. 301 00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:14,397 And by "fine ladies," I mean you. 302 00:12:20,645 --> 00:12:22,060 You want some coffee? 303 00:12:22,094 --> 00:12:24,165 - That's coffee? - No. 304 00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:25,891 Jesus, what do you do down here? 305 00:12:26,103 --> 00:12:27,376 Oh. 306 00:12:27,410 --> 00:12:28,723 Here you go. 307 00:12:28,929 --> 00:12:30,896 Sure, all right. I've never tried this before. 308 00:12:30,931 --> 00:12:33,140 - Yeah. - Kill some time. 309 00:12:33,174 --> 00:12:34,659 Oh, my God. 310 00:12:34,693 --> 00:12:36,902 Oh, my God, what do you do in this thing? 311 00:12:36,937 --> 00:12:38,663 It's a workout. 312 00:12:38,697 --> 00:12:40,009 - Buckle up. - Yeah. 313 00:12:40,043 --> 00:12:41,804 You're going for a helluva ride. 314 00:12:41,838 --> 00:12:43,668 - Hold my breath. - Yeah. 315 00:12:46,843 --> 00:12:48,742 What am I watching? Is this a train set? 316 00:12:48,776 --> 00:12:50,433 Yeah. 317 00:12:52,332 --> 00:12:53,954 It's a little boring, isn't it? 318 00:12:53,988 --> 00:12:56,197 Ah. Yeah. 319 00:12:56,232 --> 00:12:58,614 - What are you supposed to do? - You're doing it. 320 00:12:58,648 --> 00:13:01,030 That's it? You just watch it go around the track? 321 00:13:01,064 --> 00:13:02,131 That's right. 322 00:13:02,323 --> 00:13:03,584 If you like model trains so much, 323 00:13:03,619 --> 00:13:04,758 why don't you build a real one? 324 00:13:04,792 --> 00:13:07,692 Fat fingers and little, teeny, tiny parts 325 00:13:08,231 --> 00:13:09,349 just don't mix. 326 00:13:09,383 --> 00:13:10,695 All right. That was fun. 327 00:13:10,729 --> 00:13:13,456 No, whoa, don't take it off mid-game. 328 00:13:13,491 --> 00:13:14,492 You'll lose. 329 00:13:14,526 --> 00:13:16,873 How do you lose watching a train set? 330 00:13:16,908 --> 00:13:19,688 Oh, lost. 331 00:13:20,049 --> 00:13:21,326 It's all your fault. 332 00:13:21,361 --> 00:13:24,018 I need B.J. to make me feel better. 333 00:13:26,262 --> 00:13:27,422 Oh. 334 00:13:27,631 --> 00:13:29,909 I'm B.J. I bet you boys like that, huh? 335 00:13:30,024 --> 00:13:31,336 - Don't say that. - Uh, yeah. 336 00:13:31,371 --> 00:13:33,545 You think I have a pretty mouth for a B.J.? 337 00:13:33,580 --> 00:13:35,340 - Yeah. - You want to kiss it? 338 00:13:35,375 --> 00:13:37,066 Uh, yeah. 339 00:13:37,100 --> 00:13:38,550 - Okay. - Oh. 340 00:13:41,426 --> 00:13:43,555 I also think you have a really pretty mouth. 341 00:13:43,590 --> 00:13:45,833 - Okay. - Hey, okay. 342 00:13:45,868 --> 00:13:47,352 No, there's too many teeth in that mouth. 343 00:13:47,387 --> 00:13:49,250 Get back on my lips, other one. 344 00:13:55,533 --> 00:13:56,879 If the earth is round, 345 00:13:56,913 --> 00:13:59,373 then how come this bottle ain't sliding off the table? 346 00:13:59,427 --> 00:14:00,521 Gravity. 347 00:14:00,648 --> 00:14:02,229 You should come to one of our meetings. 348 00:14:02,433 --> 00:14:04,907 There's a lot more of us flat-earthers on this globe than you think. 349 00:14:04,908 --> 00:14:06,075 All right, I can't do this anymore. 350 00:14:06,095 --> 00:14:07,629 I can't listen to any more conspiracy theories. 351 00:14:07,630 --> 00:14:09,756 - Hey, these are just my opinions. - Which are wrong. 352 00:14:09,758 --> 00:14:11,528 - According to who? - The laws of science. 353 00:14:11,563 --> 00:14:13,013 - And who wrote those? - Scientists. 354 00:14:13,047 --> 00:14:15,809 And those are their opinions, which just so happen to be fake. 355 00:14:15,843 --> 00:14:17,143 What's so hard to understand about that? 356 00:14:17,144 --> 00:14:18,673 Where the hell is my sister, anyway? 357 00:14:18,708 --> 00:14:19,971 You want to hear another opinion 358 00:14:20,038 --> 00:14:22,118 - that people think is just a "theory"? - Not really. 359 00:14:22,119 --> 00:14:23,908 Your sister runs an underground syndicate 360 00:14:23,909 --> 00:14:25,680 that traps men, extracts testosterone, 361 00:14:25,715 --> 00:14:27,130 and relieves them of their manhood. 362 00:14:27,165 --> 00:14:29,201 Yeah, who's got a basement in a trailer? 363 00:14:29,236 --> 00:14:30,996 - Oh, that's a man cave. - Mnh-mnh. 364 00:14:31,031 --> 00:14:32,377 It's a man grave. 365 00:14:32,411 --> 00:14:34,758 These are all a year after living with your sister. 366 00:14:34,793 --> 00:14:35,898 - Before. - After. 367 00:14:35,932 --> 00:14:37,037 - Before. - After. 368 00:14:37,071 --> 00:14:38,901 - Before. - After. 369 00:14:38,935 --> 00:14:39,942 Before. 370 00:14:39,943 --> 00:14:42,525 And you know what that after looks like. 371 00:14:45,355 --> 00:14:46,909 That's not really you, is it? 372 00:14:46,943 --> 00:14:48,082 Yeah. 373 00:14:48,117 --> 00:14:49,981 I can see how B.J. fell in love with that, 374 00:14:50,015 --> 00:14:52,846 but what happened? 375 00:14:52,880 --> 00:14:55,193 I was onstage. 376 00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:57,333 The bass player, man. 377 00:14:57,367 --> 00:15:00,232 It was an accident. I fell and broke my leg. 378 00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:05,422 And then B.J. has been by my side ever since. 379 00:15:06,721 --> 00:15:08,413 It was B.J. 380 00:15:08,447 --> 00:15:09,621 That's a beautiful story. 381 00:15:09,655 --> 00:15:12,100 So you never went back to the band or a gym? 382 00:15:12,101 --> 00:15:13,556 No, man. 383 00:15:13,590 --> 00:15:16,296 Gym closed, band kicked me out. 384 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:19,044 Yeah, you'd be surprised how quickly 385 00:15:19,079 --> 00:15:20,597 they can replace a bassist. 386 00:15:20,632 --> 00:15:21,909 Not really. It's not that hard. 387 00:15:21,944 --> 00:15:25,568 Anyway, I was about to start my solo career 388 00:15:25,602 --> 00:15:29,261 until B.J. accidentally broke my pelvis. 389 00:15:29,296 --> 00:15:30,604 Whoa. How'd she do that? 390 00:15:30,605 --> 00:15:32,782 She ran over me with her car. 391 00:15:32,816 --> 00:15:34,818 I'm sensing a trend here. 392 00:15:34,853 --> 00:15:36,087 Are you sure it was an accident? 393 00:15:36,088 --> 00:15:38,270 The first time, for sure. 394 00:15:38,305 --> 00:15:41,308 First... How many times has she hit you with a car? 395 00:15:41,342 --> 00:15:44,186 Three times with a car. 396 00:15:44,621 --> 00:15:46,761 One of those was definitely my fault. 397 00:15:46,796 --> 00:15:48,902 I should have known to roll out of the way 398 00:15:48,936 --> 00:15:50,834 before she backed up in reverse. 399 00:15:50,869 --> 00:15:52,250 Dude, this sounds like "Misery." 400 00:15:52,284 --> 00:15:54,908 Oh, no, it's not that bad. 401 00:15:55,169 --> 00:15:58,497 You know, I'm hard on her, but she is an average cook. 402 00:15:58,532 --> 00:16:01,259 "Misery" like the mov... Forget it. 403 00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:03,261 Listen, I'm not into conspiracy theories at all, 404 00:16:03,295 --> 00:16:07,127 but she sounds like she's an insane woman. 405 00:16:07,161 --> 00:16:10,648 Oh, no, no, she's bipolar and schizophrenic, 406 00:16:10,854 --> 00:16:13,650 but other than that, man, she's a picture of mental health. 407 00:16:13,685 --> 00:16:15,652 Okay. 408 00:16:15,687 --> 00:16:17,447 Um, you know what? 409 00:16:17,482 --> 00:16:18,862 It was great to meet you, 410 00:16:18,897 --> 00:16:21,313 but before any of this happens to me, I'm gonna... 411 00:16:21,348 --> 00:16:22,970 I'm gonna get the hell out of here. 412 00:16:23,005 --> 00:16:24,178 Good luck. 413 00:16:24,213 --> 00:16:26,077 Yeah, well, I tried to do that once. 414 00:16:26,111 --> 00:16:28,803 When I asked to leave, the voices in her head 415 00:16:28,838 --> 00:16:31,806 accidentally smashed my jaw with a brick. 416 00:16:31,841 --> 00:16:33,601 Dude, this door is locked from the outside. 417 00:16:33,636 --> 00:16:36,816 Yeah, she locks the doors for my safety. 418 00:16:38,158 --> 00:16:41,367 She makes me wear this ankle monitor. 419 00:16:41,816 --> 00:16:44,384 She likes to know where I am all the time. 420 00:16:44,819 --> 00:16:50,021 I can get all the way out to the mailbox before I get shocked. 421 00:16:51,067 --> 00:16:52,829 And it only hurts a lot. 422 00:16:53,035 --> 00:16:54,898 Dude, these are all nailed shut! 423 00:16:54,933 --> 00:16:57,280 Yeah, you got to keep the windows shut. 424 00:16:57,315 --> 00:16:59,656 If you're gonna lock the doors, no point. 425 00:17:04,770 --> 00:17:06,876 Yeah, that's a steel door. 426 00:17:06,910 --> 00:17:10,025 Figured that out on my third time I broke my shoulder. 427 00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:12,033 Oh. Ah! 428 00:17:13,262 --> 00:17:14,435 Shit. 429 00:17:15,747 --> 00:17:16,920 So what are you saying? Are we... 430 00:17:16,955 --> 00:17:18,198 Are we trapped in here? 431 00:17:18,232 --> 00:17:19,241 Yeah. 432 00:17:19,713 --> 00:17:20,752 What do we do? 433 00:17:26,068 --> 00:17:27,517 That is so unnerving. 434 00:17:27,552 --> 00:17:29,036 This is insane. You're both insane. 435 00:17:29,071 --> 00:17:31,383 What kind of guy would get trapped by a 100-pound woman? 436 00:17:31,418 --> 00:17:33,580 Kind of guy who doesn't have the ability to get away, 437 00:17:34,041 --> 00:17:35,560 like Clump over there. 438 00:17:35,594 --> 00:17:37,010 My God, why would you call him that? 439 00:17:37,044 --> 00:17:39,046 - That's so mean. - That's what he calls himself. 440 00:17:39,081 --> 00:17:41,428 You need our help, you know where to find us. 441 00:17:45,121 --> 00:17:46,536 Oh, God. 442 00:17:48,573 --> 00:17:50,230 I'm taking my vagina out of storage. 443 00:17:50,264 --> 00:17:52,370 You want to blow the dust off? 444 00:17:53,992 --> 00:17:57,685 Robin, you were right about everything. 445 00:17:57,720 --> 00:17:59,409 I need to be more selfish. 446 00:17:59,894 --> 00:18:01,931 I want you to make love to me on that pinball machine 447 00:18:01,965 --> 00:18:03,636 like Jodie Foster in that movie. 448 00:18:04,106 --> 00:18:05,854 No, she was raped in that movie. 449 00:18:06,073 --> 00:18:09,387 Well, we're gonna need some more wha'sup, wha'sup juice, then. 450 00:18:09,421 --> 00:18:10,871 Oh, hey, pretty. Let's get... 451 00:18:10,905 --> 00:18:12,079 Hey, stop, stop. 452 00:18:12,114 --> 00:18:13,681 You're trying to make out with everyone in here. 453 00:18:13,682 --> 00:18:15,255 No, quit it with the twincest. 454 00:18:15,289 --> 00:18:16,773 I just want a little of what you have. 455 00:18:16,808 --> 00:18:18,361 I want a Nate of my own. 456 00:18:18,396 --> 00:18:20,592 Well, looks like you and Clump were hitting it off pretty well. 457 00:18:21,160 --> 00:18:22,471 Oh, my God. 458 00:18:22,607 --> 00:18:24,609 Why would call him that? That's so mean. 459 00:18:24,643 --> 00:18:25,748 Oh, no, he calls himself that. 460 00:18:25,782 --> 00:18:27,364 - No, I don't. - Oh. 461 00:18:27,957 --> 00:18:29,476 Um, okay. Well, let's go. 462 00:18:29,510 --> 00:18:30,960 Mm, no. 463 00:18:32,651 --> 00:18:34,826 Boo! Boo, Robin! 464 00:18:34,860 --> 00:18:36,759 She's trying to make me go home! 465 00:18:36,793 --> 00:18:39,106 All right, all right. 466 00:18:39,865 --> 00:18:41,074 Boo! 467 00:18:47,183 --> 00:18:48,460 - B.J.! - Don't touch me. 468 00:18:48,495 --> 00:18:52,085 - Let's go. - Stop touching my skin! 469 00:18:55,053 --> 00:18:58,505 - Come on. - Get off me! 470 00:19:00,679 --> 00:19:01,749 Ah. 471 00:19:01,784 --> 00:19:03,303 Come on. You touch me one more time, 472 00:19:03,337 --> 00:19:04,511 I will knock you off that stage, 473 00:19:04,545 --> 00:19:06,651 handcuff you to a broken truck door in a deserted barn, 474 00:19:06,685 --> 00:19:08,346 and I will leave you for dead. 475 00:19:09,136 --> 00:19:10,496 You're insane. 476 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,174 But it was so good seeing you. 477 00:19:12,208 --> 00:19:13,865 Let's not let so much time pass in between visits. 478 00:19:13,899 --> 00:19:15,556 Okay, bye. Call me. 479 00:19:24,186 --> 00:19:25,798 Mm. 480 00:19:26,464 --> 00:19:28,080 I love you so much. 481 00:19:28,742 --> 00:19:31,503 Oh, my God, babe, you were so right about your sister. 482 00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:33,359 She is nuts. 483 00:19:33,574 --> 00:19:35,507 She trapped us in this trailer. 484 00:19:35,542 --> 00:19:37,130 We got to call the cops on her or something. 485 00:19:37,164 --> 00:19:39,233 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, you were right. 486 00:19:39,580 --> 00:19:41,897 I need to stop meddling in other people's lives. 487 00:19:42,342 --> 00:19:43,688 I just want to be with you. 488 00:19:43,722 --> 00:19:45,655 And I know I don't say this to your face, 489 00:19:45,709 --> 00:19:48,539 but you're everything to me. 490 00:19:48,555 --> 00:19:50,867 - Of course I am. - Okay, don't get a big head about it. 491 00:19:50,902 --> 00:19:52,145 - Let's go. - No, wait. 492 00:19:52,179 --> 00:19:53,284 We got to bust him out of here. 493 00:19:53,318 --> 00:19:55,069 He used to be a famous bassist. 494 00:19:56,114 --> 00:19:57,805 He wasn't that famous. 495 00:20:05,399 --> 00:20:07,201 B.J.! 496 00:20:07,505 --> 00:20:09,469 B.J.! 497 00:20:10,197 --> 00:20:14,755 I want to watch "Rudy," but all my DVDs are on the ground. 498 00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:17,480 B.J. 499 00:20:17,515 --> 00:20:19,464 Oh. 500 00:20:20,207 --> 00:20:22,175 Think I broke another finger. 501 00:20:26,571 --> 00:20:27,732 Oh. 502 00:20:29,872 --> 00:20:33,289 Wha'sup with you, B.J.? You cut your hair. 503 00:20:34,808 --> 00:20:36,396 God, what's this? 504 00:20:36,430 --> 00:20:38,850 Oh, it's just some loose hair. 505 00:20:40,123 --> 00:20:41,960 Everybody's got loose hair. 506 00:20:43,472 --> 00:20:44,507 Maybe in menopause. 507 00:20:58,276 --> 00:21:00,986 Synced and corrected by hawken45 for www.addic7ed.com